Pandamonium review for the Italian magazin "Metal Shock" (translated by Saverio Piazzai, thanx a lot!)

 

You can't imagine how much time I spent looking for a Blackseed Boys album between Mp3, Vitaminic and their personal kingdom, www.blackseedsboys.de! And after this long and hard work, I finally got it in my hands! I'll show it to you quickly... more or less tow years ago, more than a person believed in a miracle in front of the madness called Die Apokalyptischen Reiter. I'm talking about "All you need is love", probably not a "seminal" album of atmospheric Black Metal, but surely a "hard" and terribly mad album (the title tells all) that was going to make many proselytes. And so it happened... And when D.A.R. ran away from a lunatic asylum no one seemd to close the hole where they came from. And so were also freed the BsB, a duo (that means Gyrospitath and Grummel Griesgram supported by an unidentified number of singers) so stupid, so consciously stupid that they don't even want to hide it. Also: the pelouche panda on the cover dressed like a metal shocker (Aldo, what do you think about electing him to our Metal Shock mascot?), ultraradically "hard and impure" ( I have to say that it looks like Abbath of Immortal... with some more kilos) makes me assured of the alterated state of mind of these two Germans.

But what exactly is "Pandamonium..."? A big leg pull, their double attack to music biz and to the exaggerate and prolix use of common places that populates the underground scene: the exact amount of irony, sarcasm and... Black Metal! So a rubbish-album, but maybe not so rubbish; the 14 stupid parodies are forced to be lyrically stupid, but they're accompanied by a very strong Gothic Black, between Hypocrisy, Cradle of Filth and Abigor, maybe not too original, but with an optimum effect. Also, how to remain untouched by tracks like "Sliced Girls Wannadie" (do you remember Spice Girls' Wannabe??), "Castle Pain-iiiiaaaaa (remix of the soundtrack from the Nintendo game, Castelvania!!!), "Quit Slaying Saints (The Blackstreet Noise)" (Quit Playing Games With My Heart by original BSB)... and again "Shattering Heaven's Door" (alias "Knockin' On Heaven's Door") the masterpieces like "Britney Fears One Whore Crime" and "Duck FunOral (Secrets of the Black Warts)" the only parody of a Black Metal track. It's crippled, denatured and reduced to a stupid little music. If you can't stand all those defenders, fuckin' alternatives or depressed dark people, this album is for you. If you don't want to pay some money for this Mister CD, you can download the complete tracklist from their site.The choice is yours...